Saying Sunday

Today I am sharing with you two little known to the public phrases from my life. Hate me if you want for one, but he is my kid I know his humor and trust me he prefers it this way.

In December the Baby Waterboy was diagnosed with Asperger's Syndrome, nothing to worry about it just helps explain a few things and it does in fact help you (you as in the two people who read this mess of mumbo jumbo that is in my head) understand how in the world the Valentine's story I am sharing today even happened, but for now back to Asperger's. When this all started a few months ago I picked up every book I could find on Asperger's and read and read and it was technical and clinical until I found one in particular titled Look me in the Eye and I finally felt some sort of connection. Not only had I read other books by the author's brother but the things that this author wrote about hit home and everything started to look up and make a bit of sense to me. At some point in the book it was pointed out that the name Asperger's could sound an awful lot like Ass Burger and I had my hook. Since that time I have used that little phrase to get me through the rough spots and believe me.. I need something to get me through those. So there is phrase one of today's post Ass Burger.

Definition
Ass Burger- everything and anything that you can not possibly understand that happens in this household which are many.
Example of usage
"Mama I can't figure out what in the world that Baby Waterboy is talking about."
"Don't worry about it Watergirl it is just an Ass Burger."
(fits of giggles all around)

Now, remember where I told you above that the diagnosis did not come until just this December? Well the below story I wrote about the Baby Waterboy back in February 2006 back when he was just a Dude.

Every now and then there is proof..

That the kid is really mine. Well other than the fact that he looks just like me that is.

For Valentine's Day my roommates Ex Husband.. (yes we are all friends.. talk about putting the fun in dysfunctional) gives Dude a box of chocolate (oh and I got some too) Anyway this is about Dude not what we all got for Valentine's Day. So here is Dude sitting at the bar looking at this box of chocolate that he just received via me because the Ex Husband wasn't there at the time. I had already said.. here this is from E so he wouldn't get confused and think I had actually purchased him anything. After about 30 seconds of him looking at the box he looks up at me with those brilliant green eyes and says..

"Mama, how did E know I liked Ass- Or- Ated chocolate".. That is right.. ass. or. ated! After 30 minutes of laughing at him.. I composed myself enough to look at him and say..

Yup.. You're mine.

Phrase Two of today's post Ass Or Ated.

Definition
Ass Or Ated- a combination of things in a mumbo jumbo mess
Example of usage
What you are reading today are the Ass Or Ated thoughts in my mind.

HAPPY VALENTINE'S DAY PEEPS!
Smoochies all around.
Re

Keeping with the theme....

Dearest Sleep,

Thank you sooooooo much for visiting last night. I can't even begin to tell you how much that meant to me. I am sending you flowers and chocolates later today so that maybe you will visit again tonight. Oh and how could I forget.. a bottle of wine! We will be sharing a bottle of wine this evening.

Hugs and Kisses Sleep! I love you so much.
Hope to see you later tonight...
Re.


Side note: apparently sleep stretches that last over 6 hours cause me to completely lose my mind. Need proof? See what I wrote above. On the serious side of it all I haven't slept well in WEEKS it has really started taking a toll on everything around me so when I woke up this morning and it was not pitch black outside and I realized that 6 hours and 15 minutes had passed since I put my book down I was incredibly excited!

Some times it is the little things. Happy Saturday Everyone.

The week of Letters...

This week has taken a turn that wasn't expected. It has been the week of letters on my blog. I have felt the need to vent my frustrations and let it be known exactly how I have felt in forms of letters directed to exactly where my frustrations and feelings lie. Today will be no different from that other than the fact I can't address the letter correctly because someone felt compelled enough to leave me a message on my blog but didn't have the balls to leave their name so I could let them know exactly what I thought of their little statement.

So I am doing a public reply to you and giving you the name I think you deserve in response to your anonymous post as quoted below.

"why are you calling your kid's the water kid's what because they know what water is? they never have worked on the water a day in there life..you have to earn the rep not just take it."

Dearest Clueless,

While I do believe you and I would agree on the fact that the "Water" title needs to be earned as in a Waterman or Waterwoman (and yes I do know a fe. Shout out to Cheryl, Amanda, and Karen you ladies are amazing) the title of Waterkid is bestowed on you directly from your parents status, very similar to an Army Brat. It is a title that the children earn their own ways much like the title of Watermans Wife. While we are not out on the boat every morning battling the weather and tides and facing the fact that what they are is a dying breed. We are the ones that are there at the end of the day, we are the ones facing the end of a era with them, we are the ones that know all to well how little there is out to catch out there.

My children get up and go to school every day and walk through school with the surname of a Water family, no one can strip them of that. When they go places they are referred to most of the time by their last name... hey look there is that _______ kid. Not only are my kids the children of a waterman, they are also greatgrandchildren, greatgreatgrandchildren, nieces and nephews, cousins and brother and sisters of watermen, so if that doesn't give the right to be called waterkids I don't know what else does.

Now that I have gotten that off my chest, I will also let you know that in a way I do agree with you and if you had been smart enough to read all of my posts prior to posting you would have seen that on the Oldest Waterboys 18th birthday I bestowed him with a new blog name as he was no longer a Waterkid and it was time for him to make his own way in the world, the plan is to do the same with the younger two... in the mean time they will be The Waterkids the title they EARNED.

Sincerely,
The Watermans Wife.

Dearest NYC,

My Dearest NYC,

I am so sorry I will not be gracing you with my presence this weekend. So incredibly sorry! Please forgive me... and blame Mother Nature... that evil bitch.

(insert picture here that blogger didn't allow this morning)

Your Friend,

Re

The NYC trip was officially canceled last night when I hit the cancel button on my train ticket, I was the last one to cancel.. I was hoping for some sort of miracle and that all of a sudden they would introduce a new train that flew over the tracks with the trees down on them. (Come to think of it I think these are called planes but that isn't the point here.) I was looking for a miracle.

I needed this trip more than I could possibly even put to words, so you peopled will have to please forgive me for the ensuing funk that I am about to go in... The Dark and Twisties.... I will have the Dark and Twisties for awhile it seems (except for when I am Drunk and Toasted)

I will be doing something this weekend if it is nothing.

Now I need to go fix a Coffee Royal to make through the morning... Dark and Twisty... time to meet Drunk and Toasted!

RE'sycled Wednesday

I know that some of you know I had another blog not to long ago... well even longer ago than that I had another one. I wanted to share with all of you some of the things that I wrote way back then ... Wednesday's will be Re's Recycling day.

June 18th 2006 - blog- Drake's Mom Knits and Wears Combat Boots


See?? You really can't fix stupid.....

and on top of that it is hereditary. My mother actually had me explain to her yesterday what exactly a blog was. At first she wanted to know what the letters stood for. Uh.. they stand for nothing.. it is a word. A word like.. word. She says "I don't understand" I say "I don't understand what you don't understand. Blog is a word not letters.. Well it is letters but the letters don't mean anything .. well the do mean something but only if you smoosh them together.. separately they mean nothing." She makes me move along at this point. Right now I am not sure that she understands that the letters only mean something if smooshed but that is her problem not mine. So she says "what do people do with blogs?" Well I myself I read them. It isn't like you can take them out on a date.. or to the movies .. or to dinner.. well I suppose you could if you had wireless but I prefer human contact at these places not just the warm glow of my laptop screen. She replies with "I don't understand." You aren't understanding a lot today are you ma. Ok.. seriously a blog is short for web log.. Before I can finish I get.. "Why did they take away the WE part of it?" Shit. I am never going to finish this conversation. "Because Ma there is no WE in Blog a blog is about ME or I never WE. Well maybe some blogs are about WE.. but MY blog is ABOUT ME. So I didn't like WE on there so just drop it ok!" Ok back to the conversation.. I explain that blogs are online journals BREAK IN AGAIN "Why didn't they just call them that? It sounds better than Blog."
"Christ woman.. SHUT UP ALREADY. I don't know and I don't care. It is a blog now.. just call it that!!!" Back on topic. I explain it is where people go online and share experiences and thoughts and memories and stories and opinions. You can write anything to a blog.. anything at all. And you can write it BADLY like I do. I don't even have to use any punctuation and Mrs McDaniels is not going to come up behind me and give me an F like she did that one time when I tried that just to be creative. She didn't like me much. I explained that some peoples blogs (get over it and quit shuttering every time I use the word blog.. it is what it is called) are serious.. some are funny.. some tell of sickness .. some tell of happiness. There are about everything and nothing. It is a world in which I can get lost and forget who I am supposed to be and be who I really AM. She then says.. "OH you have your own blog?"
"Yes ma I do."
"What is the name of it?"
"Doesn’t matter ma.. you don't want to read it.. it is about me."
"Yea.. you are right."
After an audible sigh on my part I get back on topic.
"So do you now understand what a blog is?"
"Yes I think I do.. it is one of those annoying things that pops up when I am trying to find something online and I have close about 20 of them."

Goodbye ma.

A Letter to a Train

Dear Amtrak Northeast Regional 84,

I do understand that this past weekend put a crippling dump of snow on your beautiful tracks that stretch from Richmond to NYC, and for that I am very sorry. I know that the trees that have fallen over your tracks have to be heavy and probably bruised you in places. It does not escape me that the snow laying on you is cold and you could probably use a Meespurr or a good stiff shot of Brandy to keep you warm. For all of these things I am incredibly sorry.

It is my understanding that Mother Nature is not quite finished beating you up and calling for another round of 10 to 20 inches of the white not so warm stuff to fall along your NoVA corridor later today and into tomorrow. I am offering to go beat up Mother Nature for you at this point, I mean she is just being down right MEAN, and you are my friend and I like to protect my friends.

Because I have offered to protect you and stand up and fight for you, I believe this means you can come out of hiding. There is no reason for you to hide in the garage like a coward anymore! Get out of there and back on your run ... remember the little train that could? "I think I can, I think I can, I think I can!!!"?? Now is your turn little train.. THINK YOU CAN.

Your Friend,
Re

PS. If you don't come out of that garage by Thursday morning at 6 am... I will in fact turn to other means of transportation to get me the HELL OUT OF HERE and our friendship will be OVER.

The ramble, the contest, and the angel.

I sit here and look at this blank screen and have all these words swirling around my head but there isn't twenty words that belong on the same page. This is where I find such trouble with the daily posting thing.. I can't just grab a thought and run with it.. it swirls and swirls and goes round and round and turns into a jumbled mess of incoherence. Much like the paragraph you just read.

So you wanna know why I am here.. cause someone asked that I try. So I am trying. You are welcome person who asked me to try.

Speaking of trying. If you are here and haven't been to Life in Mathews today hop on over and give Nemenim's ghost a name. I stand firm that it is a lady ghost... but the request has been made that male and female names be submitted.

Now that we are on the topic of ghosts, have you ever seen one? Felt one? Just knew you were in the presence of something that was different than you? I have. Wouldn't mind being in that situation again, I was neither afraid or excited it just was calming and like looking at things underwater. Do you remember the show Touched by an Angel? I can honestly say that I was. That my angel came back just to make sure I was ok and that will be a moment in time that I will treasure for the rest of my life. That someone thought enough to come back from the other side just to make sure I was ok with the tragedy that had occurred.

I wonder how many of you are now thinking of sending the men in little white coats for me. Don't bother... I already know I am insane. Happy Monday All!

Oh just a little side note: In case you are wondering what the picture above has to do with contests, or brain ramblings, or semi ghost stories.... THOSE ARE GHOST POTS!
I kid you not.

THREE DAYS!!!!!!