Wednesday, October 27, 2010

With Regret

Technically it was with mockery but whatever, I have written my obituary. I am hoping that between now and then it will be filled in with yet more fun facts but for now here we go.

Please feel free to send me any edits you would like made, I will approve or reject and squeeze them in when I can make time over the next 60 plus years.

With deepest regrets this obituary is running to inform you that Ann Marie Burroughs Haywood has perished.
Re died unexpectedly late last evening while entertaining a guest that should probably remain nameless.
While Re lived a long life of 90 plus years (none of us are supposed to know she is really 103) she still was spry enough to seduce the youngest of men, and did so frequently in her home in the Outer Banks of North Carolina and her summer cottage in Italy.
She leaves behind 3 children, two sons, Drake (76) who is still going strong in the competitive video game circuit while donning black hair and Dustin (81) who is made millions creating video games that only his brother Drake can beat and a daughter Deanna (79) who still wonders daily if this bizarre creature was really her mother. Also in her wake she has left a trail of men who may never get over her untimely departure from this life, one Sisper who is still laughing at the fact Re predeceased her and her OPM who loved Re unconditionally but who did not share with her the survival juice so she could make it to .. well let's just say older, so now OPM will be haunted for eternity.
Re will be met in the afterlife by her loving father, Henry Burroughs, her fake mother (who is still rolling over in her grave) Ruth Ann Hutson, her real mother who shall remain nameless as well to protect the not so innocent, a beautiful half sister who helped Re figure out the mystery of her parentage, her sweet angel Dustin Stilwell, and countless envious friends and relatives.
Please plan to attend the HomeGoing Party to be hosted by Ms Haywood's Sisper Phyllis Marsh at her Estate in Mathews County "Firefly Manor".
In lieu of flowers please plan to bring booze.

Tuesday, October 12, 2010


This post is brought to you by the letter W for Wine (probably too much of it) and the number 4 for how many too much.

Do you have a soulmate? What are your actual thoughts on what a soulmate is?

Is it someone who is in your life for a long extended period?
Is it someone who no matter how long or short they were in your life just had a profound impact on your life?
Is it someone who you are in love with and fall into a marital type relationship?
Is it someone who through life and death you still have a connection to?
Does your soulmate have to be of the opposite sex?

This is for you people out there that I see reading who don't always comment too.. I see you so leave a comment let me know you what you think.

In loving memory of Pansy Boy.

Saturday, October 9, 2010

Friday, October 8, 2010

Mathews County Blog

So apparently in order to have a blog come up under any search for Mathews County Blogs you must have a Blog post with Mathews County in the title. Even if that blog post is about a pot bust it comes up in a google search, me I don't get so much as a blip on the radar screen of google.

Let's see if this helps change that.

If you landed here by searching for Mathews County well.. enjoy the rest of the blog this is just a book mark!


Adventures with kitties...

For those of you who don't know my cat, Kittem was rescued out of a crab pot, very dehydrated and starving, she was but a wee little thing then.

As time has gone on she has grown and flourished and ate the entire end of my sofa scratched up a few things, but alas she is just a sweet baby; one who spends 75% of her time curled up on my bed in a ball and the other 25% of the time divided between howling at whatever it is she is howling at, scratching up my sofa, drinking water straight out the faucet (do not ask) and eating, all in all not such a bad life for a cat who was doomed to starve in a crab pot. (that is the longest sentence in history)

Now lets turn our attention to this little kitty, we will call her Muffin, just for the sake of calling her Muffin. I took this photo of her over a year ago by my neighbors house while trespassing when they weren't home taking photos of their pretty flowers. Muffin was just sitting there under a bush looking at me like I had lost my mind, which is quite possible. I attempted to catch her but my camera was not making very good bait and I didn't have a crab pot handy at the moment so I let her go on her way.

I have heard that Muffin still roams the neighborhood and is all grown up not to mention doing quite well for her self living in a mansion on the hill and driving a convertible Mercedes eating all the fish she can hold from down the dock, and staying warm at night by sneaking in boat cabins for a safe spot to nap. Now while this sounds like the life of luxury for one little stray kitty lets keep in mind that she must get up VERY early in the morning to ensure she is safely off of the boats before the watermen come down to go out for the day, this means one must turn in fairly early if you are going to get enough sleep especially if you spent the day wheeling around town in your Mercedes eating as many fish as you could hold.

This plan works out well for the most part except then THAT day happened, the day that Muffin was awaken by the car alarm on her Mercedes and she knew Kittem was back to take what was rightfully her's the low rumbling sound of the engine and the roll of the boat as it made it's way out of the creek! Muffin quickly thought to herself "How could I have over slept??!!". With a quick glance around the cabin she realized the door was open and there was light from the big ball of fire in the sky still streaming in, "This can't be possible." Muffin thought, as she decided to hunker back further in the cabin to keep out of sight. As she listened to the men discuss their work and what was going on she pieced together that she had not in fact over slept they had decided to go and set one more net!!! "What to do? What to do?" Muffin pondered over and over for what seemed like eternity, and finally that fateful moment occurred when she had no more recourse but to run for it.

Muffin found herself cornered in the cabin, trying desperately to hide from the men on the boat, but as they made their way to where the net was to be set they would be needing their gloves. In Muffin's haste to hide from the men she had backed herself right on to what the men were going to be reaching for next! As the waterman reached down to retrieve his gloves from the dark corner of the cabin Muffin had no choice but to make a break for it. Out of the cabin she ran like a dash causing the watermen to fall on his ass and think he was having a heart attack, up on to the washboard and up on to the dock.... What wait we are almost to the bay.. there IS NO DOCK. Unfortunately for our friend Muffin she figured this out about the same moment she went SPLASH! Muffin in her panic had made the dreadful mistake of jumping straight overboard with land no where in reach, and in her attempt to figure out how to get out of that cold, rough water that kept going over her head, in her ears, and up her nose, she began swimming in circles.

Lucky for Muffin she had one thing going for her, the kind hearted waterman that operated the boat, after he recovered from what he surely thought was a heart attack the shock of having a cat dart at you from the darkness, he went to check on Muffin and see if he could help her. What he
found as he looked for the mysterious diving cat was Muffin struggling to stay afloat, the kind waterman turned the boat around and with in minutes he and the piece of crap the dude that works with him had returned Muffin safely to dry boat where she went and perched on the bow until they were with in 5 foot of the dock where she made a flying leap to dry land and safety.

I haven't seen Muffin since, I betting that she has found a safer place to call home at night and I am sure she is still getting her fill of fish from down the dock, but there has to be some small part of her that wishes she had landed herself in a crab pot when she was just a wee thing.

Just a few more shots of Kittem I took yesterday.

Thursday, October 7, 2010

Two of my greatest loves...

I have a long list of great loves and I won't bore you with those details but yesterday my wonderful cousin Robbi aka Dumplin (I just got disowned again) posted this video on face book and I have watched it over and over since.

I have never embedded a video on my blog before so lets hope the gods of rock are up there watching over me.

First off we have Ozzy.. there is nothing more to say.. it is OZZY! I could have been a Sharon easily and happily. I would have had to change my name though because him screaming Re does not have the same ring as ShaRON does.
Photo take by Dustin Taylor 2010 NYC Sr Trip

The other, Mr John Winston Ono-Lennon himself. The coming Saturday, John would have turned 70 but as we all know his life was cut tragically short AT THE ENTRANCE of his home The Dakota's in 1980. When I was younger I listened to his music and thought the world should listen as well but as time moved on John and the Beatles just didn't always fall on my playlist and they were pushed to the back of my mind, until one day my oldest son expressed an interest, and that interest grew to a massive CD, book, and poster collection.

Thank you my son for reminding me that we all just need to "Let it Be", "Come Together" and just take the time to "Imagine".
Photo take by Dustin Taylor 2010 NYC Sr Trip

Imagine there's no heaven, it's easy if you try
No people below us, above it's only sky
Imagine all the people
Living for today

Imagine there's no countries, it isn't hard to do
No need to kill or die for and no religions too
Imagine all the people
Living life in peace

You may say I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will live as one

Imagine no possessions I wonder if you can
No need for greed or hunger a brotherhood of man
Imagine all the people
Sharing for the world

You may say I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
I hope someday you'll join us
And the world will live as one

You may say I'm a dreamer
But I'm not the only one
Take my hand and join us
And the world will live, will live as one
~John Lennon

PS. This post is about two OF my MANY great loves and in no way puts my Sisper at the bottom of any list NOR does the songs utlized in this post in anyway indicate my list of FAVORITE Beatles songs in any particular order but it has been brought to my attention that one could NOT have a Beatles post without mentioning this one.


Wednesday, October 6, 2010

A touch of fall

Tuesday evening I was coming home from a very important meeting and while cruising down the road while talking on the phone with my mother, (don't ask me what the argument was about, they are so countless I can't remember one from the other anymore and they just all pile up into one big she just plain hates me fest) I noticed the trees looked a bit odd. Me being me I threw the phone on the seat (no I don't think I said goodbye) and frantically slammed on the brakes slowed to a safe speed and found a safe place to pull over.

YankedSlowly removed the camera out of the bag and stood right in the middle of the road on the shoulder of the road out of the way of traffic and took these shots of the odd light on the tree and well someone's house I don't even know.

For some reason I think this particular tree was in the Sun god's favor Tuesday evening.

This is just the same shot toyed with a bit.

Dear People who live here next to Mobjack Farm, I am sorry if I invaded your privacy, I did not mean too but LOOK how pretty this is! The sky was just incredibly pink and gorgeous and looked like marshmallow clouds and gum drops. PS. I may have left a bit of my tire tread in front of your drive way, again, I apologize. Love, ReVogel the one who is not scared to really trespass.

Mrs BlueJ.. hmm or are you Mr BlueJ? I am going with Mrs as you appear to be wearing a boa in this shot and well I am not sure I am comfortable with Drag Queen BlueJs hanging out in my front yard.

Fall is in there air people, so much so I took out my *GASP* fall/winter clothes yesterday and put away all of the shorts and bathing suits and muu muu's until next summer.

The one good thing about fall... I LOVE taking photos of it.